Relational Intelligence

"Our day-to-day interactions will determine the quality of our lives more than the tasks or work we do, whether it's in our careers, in leadership, or in any other arena of life" (Steve Saccone).

The older I get, the more value I place on relationships. Ten years ago, my primary reasons for moving would be a career advancing position or a risky adventure that presented itself to me. Now, I'm finding that who I do life with is just as important-- if not more so-- than what I do in life.

I recently finished reading the book Relational Intelligence by Steve Saccone-- a campus pastor at Mosaic and the master-mind behind their amazing Protege experience (we stole ours from them). He encourages leaders to value people more than the task and relationships more than strategies. I love the way he begins because he roots his thesis in good trinitarian theology and moves from there to practical ways we can improve the way we relate to those around us.

Steve presents six roles of a relational genius- the story collector, the energy carrier, the compelling relator, the conversational futurist, the likeable hero, and the disproportionate investor.

I really loved the idea of being a story collector. That one resonated with some of the other areas where God is encouraging me right now.

I gained some new ideas from the chapter on the converstional futurist about moving my meetings with leaders to more meaningful places.

I was inspired by the disproportionate investor and want to challenge myself to invest more in people than I take away.

One practical take-away from this book for me is to intentionally seek feedback about my blind spots from those I lead and those that lead me. We've all got relational blind spots, and if I can find some people who are willing to name them and then commit to walking me through transformation, I will become a better leader. And more importantly, I will become a better person.

While it comes naturally to some people, relational intelligence can be learned and cultivated. If you are looking for a way to do that, this book is a good place to start.